Friday, August 14, 2009

Dueling Dating!

Movies and books have used the classic duel plot line over and over. A woman, enraptured by two men, makes them duel to win her love. Romantic, heartwarming, and an example of what true love is really about! But in the gay world, or at least where I am from, dueling can become more of a cat fight then a sword fight! It's hard to imagine that in the Erie area, one man could be dating two other men at the same time. Now, do not get this confused with cheating! Lets explore what dating truly is.

Back in the fifties and sixties, the rules of dating where re-written. When a boy fancied a girl, geewilikers, he would take her to a movie. When he decided he liked her, he would give her his letter jacket! I can only imagine that those hoop skirts worked perfectly to keep those boys at bay, lifting the skirts to the perfect height of touchy freely! But, dating was simple. If you liked someone, you dated that person, and dating was slow and simple. In today's modern world, dating is less of a state of being or stage of liking each other, and more of a verb to indicate being single, and going on multiple dates with many people.

And so, with it being set that in today's modern social world, dating is the action of going out on A date or many dates, I refer back to Erie. To have a man dating two other men at the same time just didn't happen. So, for me to be in a big city that has enough of a gay presence that any one man could be dating 2 other men, if not more, at the same time, can be a bit overwhelming. In this highly competitive dating arena, has dating become a duel to the end?

With this thought in mind, I must return to my current state of dating. It is sad to say that Brandon is out of the picture. The other morning I texted him inquiring when we would be meeting up again. This prompted his response of, "2012"... OK, fine. That's over. I guess I got my first taste of Vegas bitterness within the first 2 weeks of being here! But, as a fan of the British quote, "The Queen is dead, Long live the Queen" created to indicate that with the death of one Queen, another shall follow: I state that which is true in Vegas, "The date is dead, Long live the date!"

I contacted Peter the other evening about possibly getting dinner. He agreed, and we met at the Elephant Bar at a place called the District. This is a very nice shopping center with a lovely outdoor walking area. You can walk and browse the stores while outside enjoying the magnificent sun here in Las Vegas. So, I met peter in front of the Elephant Bar. But, the curious part about the event was that Peter was on the phone when I arrived. OK, so that wasn't the curious part. The curious part was that Peter was on the phone with another man, informing him that he liked him and wanted to see more of him. Now, I am incredibly analytical, so my mind was in overdrive at this point. I wasn't sure if I should walk away (not after buying a pair of new flip flops, obviously), or stay. I decided to stay, desiring a good meal! Peter got off the phone quickly, but not after informing the man that he would call him in a hour... Wow, an hour for our first date, this is looking promising! We entered the restaurant and were given a seat. We talked about a few things, this and that. The service was great. Our waitress was Katrina, who was a very open and friendly person. I almost felt like she was a friend that I haven't seen in long time. We both finished eating, with me in the mental state that this date was going no where fast. It turned out that we where there for about an hour and a half to two forty five minutes. After eating our desert, Peter requested we walk down the small road that leads through the District, in which I complied. We then made our way to the parking lot and to his car. After discussing a few topics, and of course stalling and some flirting, I began to proceed to my car. Peter stopped me, requesting that I come back. I took the small steps back to him, and we kissed....

And so, I am now thrown into the mix of a duel. Should I fight to win Peter's heart, or throw in the towel? It is no surprise that part of me wishes to peel my glove off, and smack the other man in the face! Game on! But another part of me says to back off. I do not like to cause troubles. But another thought crosses my mind; Should I have to fight to prove my like and intent for someone? Having to constantly feel like I must try and be better then the other man can sometimes make one feel under appreciated. And in the likely occurrence that he chooses the other man, and it fails, would I then be considered the second choice? Trying to change from my old ways of jumping into a relationship, I feel I must give it time. Only time will tell what will happen. I must ask myself though; At what point do you stop fighting, and demand a winner?!

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